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Posts Tagged ‘behaviors’

The pets and I have lived in our new digs for about 2 and a half months now and I am seeing some new personalities emerging, especially in Kryshnah and Taz.

Krysh used to live for the dripping water in our former house. The bathtub faucet stayed at a steady trickle and the kitchen faucet had a fairly decent drip. Kryshnah could usually be found drinking from one or the other. Now, here in the new house, none of the faucets drip. They don’t drain all the best, but a drip you won’t find. Krysh is devastated. She now must make due with the two water bowls I provide. Now primitive.

Le Chat Noir

The other change I see in my darling kitty is her new habit of getting into everything. I have lost count of the times the trash can has been knocked over, she is constantly underfoot as I cook, pestering me to ‘drop’ something. She is forever on the counter, knocking lids off containers or just pushing bottles over.

Today over breakfast I was considering this new behavior from my previously well-behaved girl. Well, in the old house, we lived with the constant threat of invasion from ants. Seemed they were always looking to move inside year round. So consequently I kept everything locked up. Most stuff stayed in the refrigerator. Bread, sugar bowl, anything that had been opened and only partially used. All pasta boxes were resealed in plastic storage bags. Everything and anything had to be protected from the invading insects. That meant it was also protected from Kryshnah. No tantalizing sticks of butter resting on the counter in a faux crystal dish, until now.

And the trash can had to be kept under wraps as well, stashed away under the counter behind closed doors. Moving here, I found it much easier for me to leave it under the counter’s generous overhang. No more struggling to open a cabinet door with gooey hands, I could just drop the mess in the bag and wash off. But having such ease also gave Kryshnah ease to any goodies I might have dumped in. So she searches it, frequently and often.

Now, on to Tazzie. previously, he had two posts of honor. His cage in my work-study where we were literally no more than three feet apart or his perch in the living room where he could see me through three flowing rooms. Short of the bathroom or my bedroom, I was never out of sight of him. Even outside, if I were pulling weeds and such, he could watch from his window perch. His life was pretty good.

Now, due to a new layout, his cage is in the den, which happens to be the room I spend the least mount of time in and his perch is in the work-study where I pretty much live, but it’s clear across the room, behind me. I thought it nice to place him along a wall where he has rows of windows on two sides so he can watch the world go by.

However, should I wander into the kitchen, bathroom, bedroom or even the entry or porch, he cannot see me. Oh now! Time to panic! He yells, screams, carries on like the world is ending. Hello, Chicken Little….

He calls my name and squaws, demanding that I ‘Come here’ and screams when I don’t come running. Now, if I am at the stove cooking, there is a 95 % he will get some of whatever I am making. Can he wait quietly, knowing he’ll soon be rewarded? Nope. My entire time at the stove, sink, bathtub or any other place is filled with never-ending yells and moans of clear separation anxiety.

Once I enter the study, he returns to a happy bird, contentedly preening and chattering as though the sky is once more firmly attached. Oh, by the way, will I give him a kiss, he asks.

So what is a mom to do? I’ve moved the trash can into a cabinet, leaving things piled on the table until I can find new homes for them. A bit of a pain but at least I won’t be sweeping up the floor four times a day. My butter and bread have returned to living in the fridge, at least I won’t be replacing it weekly. I stash as much as possible up in the cabinets. As far as Taz, I just grit my teeth and ride it out, hoping he will eventually realize the house has not swallowed me up and I shall return. At another view, it’s nice to know I am so precious in his sight.

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I will make no excuses for what I cannot do. I will make no apologies for what I cannot do.

If I think or suspect I can do it, I will most certainly try. If I know beyond reasonable doubts or expectations that I cannot, I shall not try. And if that decision happens to upset someone, then so be it. That is their problem, not mine. As for me, I shall only do the very best that I can for as long as I can.

Others may be irritated at my limitations, perhaps not understanding them. Or caring. I cannot help that either. I am not like more able-bodied people. Not anymore. And I make no apologies for that fact. No one is more aware of my limitations then I am, or more upset by them. No one is more inconvenienced or affected by my limitations then I am. So if there is any apology to be made, it should be made to me. But none is required.

I know what I have been reduced to. I live it each day. Others do not. I know what has been taken away from me, forever. Others might not. I still travel on. Others can only watch and form their own opinions. To each their own I say.  I know what I once was capable of, and more so, what I will never be again. I know the bitter taste of unfairness slowly melting in my mouth.

So for this I make no apologies. I am no not the person I once was. I am now less. But I am also more. Because I have had to become more in order to overcome.

I also know what I can do and do quite well. Things that so many others cannot. What most of the population cannot do actually. When I look at my list of personal accomplishments, I have to smile. How many can really do all the special and unique things that I can do? And to do so while carrying the unfair load I must carry and ‘look good’ while going it?  So few really. Just the travel weary warriors that share my same spirit of being a riser. Just those few who are like me.

When I look back at the life I have lived, at the accomplishments I have achieved, and what I am still doing, I have nothing to apologize for. The trivial things, everyday, ordinary things that I cannot do are nothing compared to the extraordinary things that I can do.

Philippians 4:13

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Lately I have been giving some thought to what we leave behind, especially in terms of our reputation. Whether we leave the neighborhood, the town, the state or this life, we all will leave important things behind us.

My thoughts are centered more on the memories of those we leave behind. Friends, family, co-workers, bosses, employees, you get the idea. All the people we come in contact with on a regular basis who have formed memories of us. Our character, our behavior, our words, our personality.

So it would be a logical thought we want to leave good, lasting memories, or impressions in our wake. We want people to say “Hey, he/she was always optimistic, great pal, looked out for others, compassionate, funny, talented, fair in his/her dealings, etc…”

But what if they don’t? What if we just think that is what they will say. And once we are gone, they can feel free to speak their mind. Good riddence. Bad trash. Trouble. Selfish. Conceited. Haughty. Evil. Heartless. Cocky. Brash. Just plain stupid.

I have to wonder, how would it feel to return one day and find out no one missed you and was glad you left, and worse, is anxious for your departure again? How sad. How possibly devastating. Perhaps even a wake up call. No, this is not a Charles Dickens Christmas story about to unfold. Just plain musings of late.

So the best I guess we can hope for is to leave a positive, good memory trail in our wake. That is my personal goal. I hope it is everyones. And some (like me) might have to stop and pause from time to time, considering what our words and actions are leaving in the minds of those around us.

I will close with this ditty I unearthed from somewhere a while ago. I keep it taped to my desk, along with my many mantras to remind me to keep my eyes on the goals.

Watch your thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words, they become actions.
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your habits, they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.

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